Monday, April 25, 2011

Sometimes It's Difficult To Face Change

I make what I consider to be bold moves, and then I get scared and start backing away. This happens even when the choices appear to be good and are bringing about good results. I am so afraid to change the status quo sometimes. I think that there will be some type of backlash if I reach beyond what I am currently doing. It may show that I don’t fully appreciate all that I have. If I actually dare to try for something else, am I showing God that I ‘m not completely grateful for everything that I already have. I think about the bible story of the talents. I fully empathize with the servant who buried his talents in the ground. He didn’t want to lose them. He didn’t have the confidence that he could do something more with it. He thought the responsible thing to do was to keep it safe. I always make my decisions based on what is “responsible”. I worry that someone (specifically my mother) might think that I am being irresponsible. I know that’s understandable at 20, but at 42 it starts to sound like I need a therapist.


Friday, April 15, 2011

Don't blame your child's poor eating habits on your child. He didn't pack that lunch, you did!

My family eats healthfully because I am the one who does the shopping and cooking. Left to their own devices, they would eat nothing but junk. My boys, ages 5 & 6 have been introduced to chemicals masquerading as foods in many different places. While at an out of town relative’s home, she brought out some type of toaster pastry. My boys looked at it and asked, “what is it?” I must admit I was a little proud that they didn’t recognize it. (Hmm, maybe they don’t watch too much TV!) I’m glad they didn’t know what it was. I would never buy it. There is absolutely nothing beneficial in it, even if they threw some vitamin c in the fruit filling. It’s not actually food, although it is edible. She started talking about how she wishes her family would eat better, but that this is what they like. I choose to believe that what I buy is what they will eat. If I don’t buy it, they may have it elsewhere and I won’t stress about it too much. However, at this point in time, most of their meals are at home, so I will do my best to have their food be truly good for them. It’s one of those mom responsibilities that I take very seriously. At a “bring your own lunch” church play group when my older son was 3, I received an earful from a mom who apparently had some guilt about what she was feeding her child. After commenting on what I and my son were eating, I then had to hear about how her 2 ½ year old wouldn’t eat anything except for chips, goldfish, and fruit snacks (which was also what she was eating). First of all, I wasn’t judging, I was just eating my lunch. Secondly, you choose what you feed your child. I’m sorry if our lunch causes you to feel guilty and self righteous.


Monday, April 4, 2011

When Hubby Helps, I Have to Keep Quiet

 I am thankful that my husband helps around the house. He does the dishes after dinner most nights. I then, of course, have to complete doing the dishes because there are things he won’t do (e.g. certain pots, the vegetable steamer, the blender, my salad spinner, etc.) The table may or may not be wiped. The dishwasher is sometimes turned on when there are only 3 glasses on one shelf. The dishwasher is sometimes not turned on when it is completely packed and there are no spoons or knives left in the drawer. I do not see any rhyme or reason to what is and is not done.

Why is it that my husband feels perfectly justified in criticizing (not critiquing, criticizing) things I do (e.g. “what made you think this recipe would taste good?”) yet when I offer one suggestion (“honey, when the dishwasher has room in it, don’t start it so I can put the breakfast dishes in tomorrow and start it in the morning”) he flies off the handle, saying “Oh, if you can do it better, then it’s up to you. I’m not going to deal with this.” (I thought we were talking about dishes, not something that needs to be “dealt” with). Why do I have to accept things being done incorrectly just for the sake of his ego? I am not a controlling person. I am glad that he is helping, but is having things done incorrectly( not differently, incorrectly) the price I have to pay? He is only too specific on how he wants things done and I don’t get all bent out of shape when he makes a simple request. What’s the deal? We’re talking household tasks, not personal characteristics, nothing to get upset about!