I make what I consider to be bold moves, and then I get scared and start backing away. This happens even when the choices appear to be good and are bringing about good results. I am so afraid to change the status quo sometimes. I think that there will be some type of backlash if I reach beyond what I am currently doing. It may show that I don’t fully appreciate all that I have. If I actually dare to try for something else, am I showing God that I ‘m not completely grateful for everything that I already have. I think about the bible story of the talents. I fully empathize with the servant who buried his talents in the ground. He didn’t want to lose them. He didn’t have the confidence that he could do something more with it. He thought the responsible thing to do was to keep it safe. I always make my decisions based on what is “responsible”. I worry that someone (specifically my mother) might think that I am being irresponsible. I know that’s understandable at 20, but at 42 it starts to sound like I need a therapist.
S-)
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