Bright Side Friday! Small Victories

My Bright Side Friday has to do with small victories. My son has struggled with speech/language/reading/ phonological issues ever since I can remember. I am thankful that we live in a great school district that has been able to provide him services, because we never would have been able to afford all of the work they have done with him.

Even so, over the years, there has been SO much frustration on his part and in turn, on mine. He is a very smart boy with a road block.  If I'd ask him the question, he could answer it right away. If I made him read the question, he couldn't even begin to figure out what is being asked. His teachers would say "He's a hard worker, but he's a slow worker". I finally realized it was because he spent most of his time trying to figure out what the words on the page were asking him to do.

This poor kid, who knows the answers, but gets them wrong because he doesn't understand the written question. Frustrating results time and time again. Spelling words made no sense to him. He memorized the letters as a picture or pattern. Sounding them out did him no good. He wasn't even capable of doing so. Every reading assignment a struggle. Every vocabulary lesson just torture. And now, that he is older, it has impacted ALL subjects. How can he describe facts about his Social Studies chapter, when there were so many new words in there, he was trying to figure it all out by context?

My heart wells up with pride for my son. This loving child with a hard head. Who could easily have given up long ago, yet for some reason doesn't. For all of the times he has felt defeated and frustrated, for all of the times homework has ended with one or both of us yelling or in tears, for all of the A+ papers his older brother has achieved with seemingly little effort, for all of the hours I have sat by his side and read his book to him so that it didn't take him hours to get through the chapter just to answer 4 questions on a work sheet, for all of the recesses and fun classes he has had to miss to get assistance, he never gave up.

And yesterday, as I sat at work, thinking about a million other worries, I got a call from one of his aides. My heart fluttered at the thoughts in my head. Would this be a call with good things or bad things? Is he struggling or worse yet, are they dropping him from the program? She was full of compliments about my son "kind, caring, loving, helpful, well liked" and compliments for me too on my part in how he has developed all of these wonderful traits. It made me feel good knowing that she REALLY cared about my son and his success. She then proudly told me that my son had exceeded his benchmarks for the time frame and she would only need to see him 2 times per week instead of 4. She felt confident that he had secured enough skills to build on moving forward.

In the past, I have had to be his advocate and fight for evaluations and services when I knew something was not right and he was slipping through the cracks. But this time, the news didn't hit me like a ton of bricks, it made me happy. Homework time has gotten SO much better. It is a little easier for him to understand. He has fewer questions and fewer melt downs. His road block is finally getting smaller and he can see over it now.

I am so thankful for small victories. What's yours?

=J

Bright Side Friday! A Little Peace

 

My Bright Side Friday has to do with having a little peace. As a busy mom, a little peace can make a huge difference.

After hiking in the U.P. a few weeks ago, my SIL and I pulled out the cooler with the food we had packed. Due to the bugs, and our exhaustion, we some how squashed the cooler between us in the front so we could dole out the food bug free and seated. Once we had the kids settled with their sandwiches, drinks and snacks, we finally both were able to grab our sandwiches. Almost in unison, we sighed as we ate the first bite. And then we laughed. There we both were grubby as can be from a hike, exhausted from corralling and cajoling children, each with less than a full seat to sit on, wedged between a full size cooler and the door, and we simultaneously enjoyed the peace. A moment when everyone was content, no one was in need of our assistance, and we were in one of the most beautiful places on earth. A moment of wonderful peace.

Now, if you have read my Monday Vent, you will know that the start of school has been anything but peaceful for me. However, things have started to fall into place, all of the Open Houses are over, there is no Friday night soccer game tonight (we play Saturday morning), and in the midst of all of this chaos, I have stumbled on a moment of peace. It is wonderful. Yes, I just heard my cell phone battery die, and I should be shutting down the equipment here at work, and left the office 11 minutes ago. However, just for a minute more, I'm going to enjoy a little peace.

Wishing you little peace too.

=J

What's your Bright Side? Have you been lucky enough to find peace?

Note: I have noticed a lot of traffic to this post for people looking for a peace sign image. It made me realize that I did not credit the site that I borrowed it from. My sincerest apologies to that site as they deserve full credit for the image. The peace sign was originally on: http://coloringpagesforkids.info/peace-sign-coloring-pages/

Monday Vent - School Started!

So, my girlfriend S-) wrote a Bright Side Friday post about school starting. Hopefully, you had a chance to read it. When I read it, I was reminded once again, that even though S-) and I are good friends, we are not the same. Perhaps that is partly why we are such good friends. But honestly, I could not share in her optimistic view of school starting. At the time of her post, I promised a Monday Vent with the opposing view. I think it speaks volumes that it took me another week to finally be able to write this.


When school starts at my house, chaos starts. It doesn't just mark the beginning of the school year, it marks the start of a million other things too. S-) is happy for the routine, while I'm frazzled by the additional places and things we are expected to be at or do at certain times.

- Sleep: I like staying up late. The kids and I slipped bedtime a bit later over the summer. Convincing my tweens that it is time to go to bed is super difficult, when they are not tired and I want to stay up and watch my late night shows. This becomes a bigger problem when it comes time to wake them up and I don't feel like waking up at 6:00 a.m. This past week, my internal clock has been waking me up a few minutes before my alarm, but I'm not happy about it. They have been better than me at jumping out of bed to get ready for the day.

- Packing lunches: I always have to feed my kids, but now I have to make sure that we have their packable lunch items. Do I have fresh fruit for today? Do I have fresh lunch meat for today? Did we run out of bread? Any non-school day, no big deal if we do or don't. On school days, I need to provide my kids with a decent lunch, that they'll eat AND will keep them energized for the school day. As I'm typing this, I am remembering that I need to buy apples for tomorrow... ugg!!!

- Soccer: I volunteer to coach soccer every year. This is obviously something that is optional for me, but I enjoy the sport and spending time with the kids. Problem? It starts the same week school starts. What's the rush? Oh yes, we play late into November! This becomes a 2-3 time/week responsibility. Thankfully, I'm co-coaching this year, so it's a bit more flexible.

- PTO: I am on the school PTO Board. Most of the year, I have very little to do. However, the first week of school is insanely busy. Again, another volunteer position that I could have just said "no" to, but I didn't. In another moment of weakness, I agreed to take over their e-mailings to the families of the district. Of course, a ton of those happen at the beginning of the year too.

- Homework: This ultimately should be my kids' responsibility, I am aware of that. Some how I still needed for setting up projects to be printed, purchasing supplies for projects, helping with the confusing questions, and reminding them (on weekends) to get their work done. Then I worry how they are doing, encourage them when they are worried about tests and quizzes, and become their cheerleader.

- Band: This also starts at the beginning of the school year. Of course, they both needed things for their instruments and I had to make a special trip to the only music store open late on a Sunday so they would have it. Back to "encouraging" them to practice and remembering to put their instruments at the front door and music in their backpacks. Again, it should be their responsibility, but I really don't feel like making the drive to school when they call and say "Mom! I need my instrument!" And I could, do the whole "natural consequences" thing, where if they forget it, they just don't have it that day. However, my kids get thrown so easily. Not being prepared for even something as simple as band, would mentally screw them up for their entire school day. Just not worth it in my book.

- Bus: Making the bus is something that my older son wants to do daily. The younger one would love it if I drove him to school everyday. I encourage making the bus. Mostly because, aside from it being a huge waste of gas, I'm usually still in flannel pants at that point. I have been there, where I thought, "who will see me?" Only to have to get out of the car with my uncombed hair, flannel pants and over sized t-shirt because my kid needed me to sign him in. Awesome. Just don't speak, or they'll know you didn't brush your teeth either.

So, there you have it. I am probably one of the few moms that don't look forward to school starting. I love being able to relax and have fun with my kids. I like letting them do their own thing or to up and do something cool just because we have time to do it. When school starts, all of that changes. I get the same sick feeling in my stomach that I did when I was a kid and the school year was starting.

When's our next day off?

p.s. The photo is from our fun, relaxing, no-schedule, trip this summer to the U.P. of Michigan. That's the stuff that summers are made of.

=J

Now it's your turn. What's your Bright Side? Is the start of school a Vent or a Bright Side at your house?

Bright Side Friday - School's Back

Since I work in an elementary school, I am very lucky that I don't work over summer break.  I thoroughly enjoyed being with my two boys all summer long.  We had a great summer.  We spent alot of time outside when it wasn't too hot.  We had quite a few picnics.  We slept in a few times. They both learned to swim.  We participated in the library reading program.  We had a very full and satisfying summer.  Even though I enjoyed all the unstructured time, I am quite content to have the school year starting again.  The boys are excited about school and really enjoy going to the after-school program, which alleviates guilt for me since I can't pick them up right after school.  Their bedtime has moved up a little bit so that they are rested for school, which gives me some more time in the evenings to collect myself and get organized for the next day.  We're falling back into a comfortable pattern of purposeful activities.  I'm looking forward to hearing about all the new things they'll be learning and all the things we'll have to talk about.  Happy Friday of the first week of school!

S -)

What is your Bright Side? Are you ready for school to start?

Clip art licensed from the Clip Art Gallery on www.DiscoverySchool.com
or http://school.discoveryeducation.com/clipart/clip/back-to.html

Camp for School?

I have always been against mindless group thinking. Sometimes, I will refuse to do something, just because “everybody's doing it”. Because of this, I am sure there are times that I have missed out on something great. I am O.K. with that. I am not a sheep. I am not mindless. Which brings me to my kids' school. The school has decided that part of the school year should have days set aside for outdoor education. Sounds reasonable, right? The school has a nature preserve nearby that it uses regularly. But that isn't good enough. When the students are in 4th grade, they are expected to go on a 1 night stay to camp. When the students are in 6th grade, they are expected to go on a 2 night stay to camp. Are my kids going to school, or camp? I expect my kids to go to school, do their homework, and work hard. I don't expect them to go to camp. I choose NOT to send my kids away to camp over the summer. Which works well for my kids, because they DON'T want to go. When I talk to school officials about camp and ask “why” the answer is “oh, it's fun”. Well, lots of things are fun that don't belong in school. I've also heard “we've been doing it for over 20 years”. Huh???  Just because something has been done for over 20 years doesn't mean it is a good idea or that needs to keep happening. Still not answering my question “Why are children expected to go to camp during the school year?” Silly me, I decide to voice my opinion in front of some of the local moms. All I really said was “I don't get it. It's like sending them to camp.” You would not believe the reaction I got. I was actually somewhat attacked for not being in support of it. After defending myself, I finally had to end the conversation by making some sort of joke about me being cynical. Yikes!

Now, before you judge me too, let me give you some more information. Point 1: “Camp is great for kids that never get to go anywhere.” Counterpoint 1: I live in an affluent area. People take 2-3 family vacations each year that take them all over the world for weeks at a time. They take weekend trips and extended weekend trips in countless numbers. Point 2: “Camp is great to give kids the experience of being away from home and their parents.” Counterpoint 2: Most kids in our area are sent away to camp over the summer. Many parents in the area also take vacations and leave their kids somewhere else. I don't think I could find a kid in our neighborhood that has never been away from his parents. Point 3: “Camp is great for kids to explore the great outdoors.” Counterpoint 3: We live in a certified “Tree City USA” and are surrounded by forest preserves and restored natural prairies. Try cutting down a tree in our town, and the fine you are hit, with will wake you up to the fact that we LIVE in the great outdoors. Point 4: “It's a different learning experience when kids are surrounded by nature.” Counterpoint 4: As I mentioned in counterpoint 3, we are surrounded by nature. We have deer, raccoon, opossum, rabbits, fox, skunks and coyotes literally in our back yard. With a mere 4 miles separating the farthest points, we have 5 federally certified nature areas. We have a nature center, complete with a building to do indoor activities, at the school's disposal. It has a river, pond, prairie and woods. We have a large forest preserve that has miles of trails, ponds and a river. We have another forest preserve that links to many others down the river. We have a nature preserve that is all prairie and we have a wooded preserve area. There are countless more facilities within a 20 minute drive.

So, my question is still unanswered... What can be done at camp, that can't be done during the day at one of these fine facilities in our own neighborhood? Lets see, craft using leaves? Yep, we've got plenty of those. Watercolor painting of nature? Yep, we've got nature. Pond study? Yep, we've got ponds and places to study them. Animal tracking? Yep, we've got animals. Geo tracking? Yep, you can do that anywhere. Trust activities? Yep, pretty sure that can be done anywhere. Star gazing? Yep, seeing as the school has the kids come to one of the forest preserves on a weekday night to listen for frogs, pretty sure they can arrange the same thing to look at stars. Team building activities in the woods? Yep, there is a facility that is about 20 minutes away, that has ALL of that and other classes have been to for the day. There is only 1 activity that I agree can not be done locally (that I know of) and that is an obstacle tower. The kids are tethered in and can try obstacles like walking on ropes high in the air. Agreeably fun, but is this 1 activity justifying the camp?

My kids are put on a school bus and driven 1 hour away for the 4th grade camp. There are parent chaperones but tell me if you know every kid in your kid's grade. They mix up the classes so kids are with other kids that they are not normally with. I finally had to tell the kids to look at each other so they knew who was in our group and could tell me who was missing. Half the time I just counted heads going to and from the activities. I had the right count, but not sure if I had the right kids! Those kids are slippery too. Turn your head for 1 second and they are heading down an embankment leading to the lake. With 7 adults standing around, I turned and saw the top of a girl's head disappearing. I called to her, thinking she was the only one and she called up 3 others! I'm not an overprotective parent, but my heart was in my throat for that one. None of the other adults thought it was a big deal and took the last kid up word on it that there weren't any other kids down there!

For 6th grade camp, the school bus ride is 1 ½ hours. There are NO parent chaperones. It is in February. Oh, and I almost forgot to mention, we also get the privilege of paying for BOTH camps. It's not something included in our fees, we are actually paying to send our kids to camp... during school. Explain to me again, why? More over, why does it seem like EVERY parent in our school district doesn't think twice about why camp is part of school? I get WHY they send them, because that's what parents in our neighborhood do, they send their kids camp. I'm not one of those parents.

=-J