Weird Word Wednesday - Ultracrepidarian

 ultracrepidarian

Today's weird word is ultracrepidarian. When I saw this one, I KNEW I had to use it. It's another one of those words that sounds complimentary, but isn't.

Ironically, when looking it up, www.merriam-webster.com didn't know the word. Congratulations to them for NOT being an ultracrepidarian site. This is a compliment. Seriously.

My younger brother IS always making ultracrepidarian comments/rants/speeches/etc. It is SO annoying! Even when he really does know what he is talking about, it is normally something that EVERYONE ELSE knows too. It comes off as if he thinks we are all idiots and his instructional jabbering is something we have never heard of before. Grrrr!

So now, when he starts up, and I walk away mid-sentence, just to make it stop, and so I don't actually resort to telling him to "SHUT THE F**K UP!" I can "thank" him for his ultracrepidarian comments, and smile.

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/ultracrepidarian

Main Entry:	ultracrepidarian
Part of Speech:	n, adj
Definition:	beyond one's knowledge or province; pertaining to opinions given on matters beyond one's knowledge; also written ultra-crepidarian
Etymology:	from Latin 'beyond the sole'

Monday Vent - Self Absorbed Sibling

Before I get into my first vent of the year, I want to wish everyone a Happy New Year! Hope 2012 brings you great things.

Now for my vent...

My mother's birthday is on January 1st. EVERY year, my mom invites us all over for a wonderful and "holiday" worthy meal to celebrate the New Year and her birthday. Just as it is with Thanksgiving or Christmas, I make sure that my kids and I are over at her house early to help set the tables, prepare food and clean up messes as they are made.

My brother and his family show up in time to eat.

Now, before I get too catty, they do contribute. Their contribution is mixing the rolls at their house. Then they show up at my mom's house to cook them. Honestly, with the crap conversations that come out of their mouths, they are also giving us a break both auditorily and mentally by showing up late.

This year my mom called over to their house at noon to see if they were making the rolls, and she woke them up! My SIL response was "We were up late". NO KIDDING? New Year's Eve was last night and you were up late? We ALL WERE UP LATE YOU DIPSH*T! Even MOM, whose birthday is TODAY was up late, and you can't think beyond yourself enough to get your ARSE OUT OF BED to come help prepare the meal or set the table!?! I mean, I know it meant nothing to you that she had hip replacement surgery 2 weeks before Thanksgiving this year, because you didn't show up early to help, and Christmas was the same story, but not even on HER BIRTHDAY???

They showed up at 2:00. The exact time my mom normally serves the fancier meals. Help was offered by both my brother and SIL when they walked in. They each did that 1 thing and then disappeared. That's when my mom and I started pouring wine into our coffee cups.

As the night went on, I would just randomly give jobs to the two of them even if there was no reason why I couldn't do it. It made me feel a bit better, or maybe it was just the wine.

I can't understand how people can be so clueless and self absorbed. I don't think they are trying to be malicious, but how can anyone be so ignorant?

Hope none of you have people like that in your lives. If you do, please share your story and possible tips to deal with them. I know there is no changing them!

Monday Vent - The Pressure of Helping

The holidays are fast approaching and I am starting to realize how unprepared I am. I am thinking about how I can gear up and knock out all of my "to do" list. The problem? I also have my mom's "to do" list. She went in for  replacement hip surgery 1 1/2 weeks ago. She is recovering beautifully, but... she still needs a ton of help. I don't mind doing it, really I don't. I love my mom and I know that I'm the only one that can do some of these things the way she wants them done. My brother makes her crazy with his own agenda and arguing with her about what she needs or doesn't need. JUST DO IT! She wants fabric deodorizer in the wash with her towels? THEN JUST DO IT! Nope. Not him. He argues with her that it doesn't need it and moves on.

I don't ask my dad, because my mom and dad are directly connected by emotional well being. If my dad thinks my mom is doing well, then he's happy. If my mom thinks my dad is happy, then she's happy. Keeping my dad out of it makes everything to him seem like it's going easier for my mom. Doing things for my mom, keeps my mom mentally happy and hence my dad too.

So I know, I could say "no" to her. But I just can't. I know that I will be purchasing all of her Thanksgiving Day food for her and getting it into her house. I will probably prepare of bunch of it too. I know, I SHOULD anyways. Why should she do the bulk of the work year after year? Even if she is able bodied enough to prepare the food this year, her stamina is not back to normal yet. So I say "yes" and "no problem" and "anything else I can do for you?" And then I put more on my plate, to put less on hers.

Who knows when she will be able to drive again. So after Thanksgiving, I will look forward to doing her Christmas shopping. I will do all of this with a smile on my face and a hug and kiss to her, while inside I will be stressing about all of my "to do" lists and my Christmas shopping. 

I do it out of love. I do it out of appreciation of all that she has done for me. I do it because I'm the only one that can. When I do it and feel stressed about it, I feel guilty.

=J

Have you found yourself in a similar situation?

Monday Vent - Annoying Brother

It's Monday. It's late. This post is late. I'm tired. I'm finally ready to vent. Honestly, some days it is SO easy for me to vent, and other days, it is much more difficult. I usually like trying to look at the glass half full. If I start looking at the glass half empty, I tend to get stuck in a rut of viewing everything that way. I have been pretty up beat this past week, so this morning, nothing came to mind when I needed to write the post. However, much can happen in a day, and here I am at the end of the day, ready to vent.

This vent is not new for me, nor is it as rage filled as it has been on other days. In fact, I am a bit rational about it right now. I realize that, for the rest of my life, I will have to live with the fact that my brother will always say things in an incredibly condescending and insulting way and my mom will always defend him. I know they love me and have no idea how their actions affect me. If I thought that they were intentionally hurtful, my attitude would be very different. They just don't get it. I've tried bringing it to their attention. I really have. They just think I'm too sensitive, crabby, misunderstood them, etc. Some days it's more difficult for me to be rational. Thankfully, today I am able to just see it as it is. It is just the way it is. It will never change. Moving on.

Now it's your turn. Do you have a vent to share? Share it and move on.

=J

Monday Vent

Photo Free Post!

Monday Vent is back! Funny how a holiday can mess up your schedule! I remembered in time for Friday, but FAR more people seem to want to vent than share happy news, so I figured I'd make it a whole week of missing posts. So today, finally got a chance to post, as I have had a migraine all morning, and NO that is NOT my vent.

Here is mine: My brother works for my dad (just them). My husband and I work together (just us). My dad has offered to take us all to Disney (which is of course VERY nice and generous). I have chosen to come back early so I can work while my brother has decided that he is going to stay 4 extra days. It is just another example of me working for every little thing and having a work ethic and my brother expecting what he gets plus more with no work ethic. The most frustrating part? My parents are enabling his behavior and expect MUCH more from me than him. I make ALL of my friends promise me, and now I'm asking you too, "If I EVER treat my kids SO differently OR enable one to be less self sufficient than he is capable of being, YELL AT ME!"

Now it's your turn!

p.s. I tried to post a photo but it locked up the site, so... I gave up!

Bright Side Friday!

Well, I'm laughing right now because I looked at the stats and MANY more people read and responded to the Monday Vent blog than the Bright Side Friday blog. Is it because people are being modest? OR is it just human nature to not truly appreciate the Bright Side of life and be too focused on the things you want to vent? I know that sometimes I feel like I have WAY more complaints than good, but that is exactly what this Bright Side Friday is for. To make us stop and really look at things, and acknowledge that Bright Side of our lives that we should be thankful for.

Here is mine: My parents have volunteered to take my kids to Disney World this summer.
(My husband and I are also invited as well as my brother, his wife and their kids. - Keep that in mind for my Monday Vent!) lol

Now it's your turn!

=J

p.s. This is a photo of my kids the last time my parents took all of us to Disney.