Over the years, I have complained too many times about the time that my husband bought me flowers for Mother's Day, at the grocery store, near the gym, on his way home from working out. Or the time, that I got flowers, from the same place with the comment "I would have been able to get you a gift, but we did that family thing yesterday." (Insert eye roll here.) So yes, my husband hasn't really blown me away in the Mother's Day arena, but over the years, I have come to accept that, that is just him. It doesn't mean I'm not appreciated. It doesn't mean I'm not loved. He does plenty every day to let me know those things. Also, after being married as long as we have, we have both mellowed a bit, become more accepting of each other and far less critical.
This year, for Mother's Day, I told my husband "Don't get me anything." I meant it. He found time to shop and bought me a pair of capri pants and a cool t-shirt. It was sweet and unnecessary, AND the wrong sizes (admittedly, I have put on a few pounds). Luckily, he still knew where the receipt was and I was able to exchange the shirt and ultimately return the capris.
Which brings me to this Father's Day. My husband told me "Don't get me anything." He meant it. I was OK with it too. I picked out a funny card for him from the kids and checked Father's Day off my list. Until Saturday night, when my kids were getting into bed, and with panicked looks on their faces asked "What did we get Dad for Father's Day?" When I told them "nothing" they replied with "We HAVE to give him SOMETHING!" Uggg... kick me in the gut. Bad, bad, unthoughtful mom. I asked them for ideas, and of course they had none. Now my brain kicks into overdrive. "Are the kids little enough to make some cute little craft and have him be overwhelmed with it?" No, at this point, Dad will know I forced 2 sleepy kids to do a crappy art project when they are capable of creating something beautiful if given enough time. Then, I remembered that my husband was planning on working out early in the morning. I should be able to go pick up something when the stores open and get back home before him. As it turned out, he slept in. I tip-toed out of the house and started driving looking for anything open besides a Walgreen's (which BTW is where I purchased his "Perfect Push-Up Equipment: As Seen On TV" the day before Father's Day last year). I ended up finding him 2 pairs of work-out shorts. OK, truthfully, I purchased 4 pair, 2 in 1 size and 2 in a larger size because I wasn't really sure what size he wore. So, we are even on the wrong size thing. To cover up for my last minute shopping, I also picked up McDonald's breakfast for everyone on the way home. We threw Dad's on a breakfast tray and carried it upstairs to him. Distracted by breakfast, I quickly threw the shorts (guessed right with the smaller size) in a gift bag with some tissue and "ta-daa!" the perfect Father's Day morning. As he opened the package, he said "I thought I wasn't supposed to get anything." Then he immediately put on a pair.
Come lunch time, my husband automatically made lunch for us all, like he always does. And at dinner, when I offered to make something (meaning = order pizza), he only wanted leftovers from lunch. I spoiled him a bit more and reheated it for him (lol).
What I took from today is that:
I have no room to complain about lack of effort on my husband's part.
I have thoughtful kids.
My husband and I have a good thing going.